I know that stigma seems to be one of my favorite topics to write about on my blog, but it is for a reason.  If we do not fight against mental illness stigma, no one is going to want to get help because they feel too embarrassed and afraid about what the world thinks of them. 

I had a client explain to me that he was actually afraid to go on a trip with his buddies because he was afraid that they would figure out that he had a mental illness and start to talk about him behind his back.  When I explained to this man that one in four Americans are diagnosed with mental illness, he seemed surprised.  He was even more surprised when I broke it down further for him: of the twelve guys that he was about to go on the trip with, three of them most likely had experienced mental illness.  He couldn't believe it. 

Why should this man feel so alone?  It is because of stigma.  Our media and pop culture stigmatizes these illnesses like no other. I leave you with the perfect example of stigma.  Check out this popular song that came out just a few short years ago.  It is called "Crazy":

I am so sorry that I haven't written in a while.  My Grandpa Morty was very sick, and passed away peacefully last Monday. 

His memory lives on, however.  I was asking myself, "what can I share with my readers about Grandpa that may help them?"  And, this is what I came up with:  Grandpa was a great listener.  Why is this so significant?  Because, he had established with me from a young age that if I ever needed to talk about anything, he would listen non-judgementally and try to understand. 

This became especially important for me when I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder.  He came from a "bite the bullet" generation where people did not believe in taking medications for mental health difficulties.  Yet, his mentality was far from that when it came to talking to me about my illness.  He told me that no matter what, he would always love me.  And, this was the most important thing that I needed to know, especially during a time when my illness made me doubt if I could ever love myself again. 

Grandpa became one of my favorite sounding boards.  I could reach out and talk to him about anything.  And, this made me feel safe. 

Children and young adults who are struggling with a mental illness need to know that they have a safe place to talk where they will not be judged.  Many of the symptoms caused by these illnesses can be scary, and kids may feel afraid to tell adults about their symptoms as a result.  The reason that I trusted Grandpa Morty with everything is because he loved me unconditionally, and I knew that. 

Sometimes, love is the best therapy.  Thanks, Grandpa!

Be Well
~ Emily

What endlessly amazed me during my time as a teacher is how many students would tell me that they were going through something difficult, or even worse, how many were obviously going through something difficult, yet in either case, the parents did not make any contact with me.  I know that some families like to keep their problems in the home, however, if your child is going through a trauma or is experiencing the onset of mental illness symptoms, it is important that you tell his or her teachers.  But, it should not stop there: the administrators, guidance counselors, school social workers, and school psychologists should also know. 

Why is this so important?  Well, a teacher is less likely to be hard on a student who is struggling, but may take extra time to help them.  But, more importantly, the team that I just listed above needs to know so that they can make a plan to help your child be more successful in school.  These people generally meet at least once a week to discuss the children in the grade who are struggling and brainstorm solutions.  However, without parent help and "buy in," the child is likely to flounder, and not get the help that he or she so imperatively needs. 

Some parents also do not say anything to the "powers that be" in school because they do not want their children to get classified.  They are afraid that to put their child in "special education," their child may not get the rich experience that they would get in a regular classroom setting.  Well, I am here to tell you that this is not always the case.  In the school that I taught, the children in special education were included in most regular education classes.  The difference was, that they got more support around things that they did not understand.  Many times, these children were the ones that did among the best in my class due to the extra support of their special education teachers. 

So, here are a few questions to ask your administrator/ guidance department when revealing that your child is struggling with mental health concerns:

1.  Is your special education department inclusive (meaning do the children that are classified get to participate in the regular classroom setting?)
2. Are the classroom aids trained in how to work with children with mental illness?
3.  Are the special education teachers trained in how to work with children with mental illness?
4.  If not, is there another school in the district that has a special education teacher specifically trained and experienced at working with this population (schools should pay to send your child to these schools, but it is up to you to fight for this). 
5. What are some reasonable accomodations that your child is entitled to?
6. Can your child see a guidance counselor/ school social worker/ school psychologist on a regular basis?
These questions are all so important for you to ask if your child is struggling with a mental health disorder. 
Remember: don't be afraid to speak up and fight for your child.  It's the squeaky wheel that gets the grease.  Children whose parents advocate for them are, in my experience, the ones who are most successful in school. 

Be Well,
~Emily

Why hire a peer support person to help your child?  I'm so glad that you asked.  Here are the top  reasons why peers are so wonderful:

1.  They've been through it, so they understand.
2.  They are less likely to be judgmental.
3.  They are more skilled at being an advocate because they've actually been there and used services themselves.
4.  They can empathize, not sympathize because they've been there.
5. They often can "call you out" on your areas of sabotage faster because they've sabotaged in similar ways.
6. They are usually motivated to show that people with mental illness can work, so they work very hard.
7.  They usually have a lot of great referral sources because they've used the providers themselves, and they know what to look for in a provider.
8.  They are in this job not to make a lot of money (because believe me, they don't), but because they really care.
9.  They are passionate about what they do, because they know first hand how hard it is to struggle with these illnesses. 

Be Well!
~Emily

For much of my life, I've had an eating disorder.  When I was 10 years old, I began dieting.  I was in dance classes, and wanted to look thin in my leotard.  This undoubtedly affected my metabolism, however, I continued to diet all the way through college. 

Then, I was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder at 18.  I found myself binging and purging through exercise, and my then anorexia turned into something known as exercise bulimia. 

Well, in my mind, things were going fine because I was still thin.  But, the thinness didn't stick around.  In my young adulthood my metabolism slowed down.  This, coupled by the fact that I was injured in a car accident, and couldn't exercise made it nearly impossible to control my weight while binging.  I had to find a new way.

For me, the new way is OA, also known as Overeaters Anonymous.  Their philosophy, which I wholeheartedly agree with is that food can be a powerful addiction, too.  And I, certainly, am an addict.  I really have always been obsessed with food.  I have now started to abstain from flour and sugar, and weigh and measure all of my foods.  It feels great!  Yes, it was rough in the first day or so, but getting through that was well worth it.  My moods are better, I feel more in control of my food, and the best part is, I'm not binging like I was. 

I hope to lose the weight, and I know I will, but this is a side benefit.  The real change is the feeling of control over something that I had long ago lost control over, and also the change in my mood.  The highs and lows are not nearly as pronounced. 

There has been some research that shows that not eating sugar and flour does improve moods.  I seriously cannot believe the difference in myself.  I visited with my very skilled Nurse Practitioner who prescribes my meds, and she said that not eating flour and sugar is a sure way to have mental peace and sanity.  And that's something worth working for!

Be Well,
~Emily